Compassionate Leadership

I have been pondering whether to blog for a while now, and after a little encouragement from Twitter, I decided to take the plunge. I intend for my blog posts to be an open and reflective account of headship and hope to bring you some enjoyment as well give you an idea of what it is like.

My first blog is about what being a compassionate leader means to me and how I came to this leadership style. My whole life I have been a people pleaser and a 'knight in shining armour' type character. I would do anything in school to get positive attention from my teachers and peers alike and would always be the first person to offer to help anybody in need. This has carried on throughout my life, which has been detrimental to my own well-being and has draw backs as a leader, as I often take on people's problems for myself and try to solve the unsolvable. However, these personality traits are what directed me into teaching in the first place - being able to help people (and yes the little bit of external feedback and adulation you can get as a teacher is important!)

Leadership does not come over night - you have to work hard at it. You have to be authentic to who you are and you cannot completely model yourself on any one person. Throughout my career I have been lucky enough to work with four different head teachers, who all taught me something important and I have been able to take elements of their leadership styles to mould me into what I wanted to be. They have also made decisions or taken actions that I did not like or agree with, and it is also important to understand what it is that does not sit right with you in these situations.

Head Teacher 1: As a NQT, this head teacher was amazing for me. She invested in me as a person and a professional and took a personal interest in my development - she even acted as a guarantor when I was renting a flat as my parents did not meet the criteria! We would have regular chats about work and life and I will never be able to thank her enough for the opportunities that she gave me to find out who I was as a teacher, but also as me as an individual; a lot of growing up happens between the ages of 22 and 25!

Head Teacher 2: This head gave me a leadership position in a new school and I felt his trust instantly. He allowed me to lead my area and make decisions. He also asked my opinion of a lot of subjects and included me in decision making. He also encouraged me to hold others to account - which is something I struggle with due to my people pleaser and saviour personality - and gave me a lot of advice in this aspect. He modelled what being a kind and reflective leader was like, but did sometimes allow other stronger voices in the SLT and governors to bully him.

Head Teacher 3: This career move to deputy headship was a mistake on my part. I was ready for the move but I jumped at the first opportunity and did not really consider what the school would be like for me. This head was a head under pressure, with challenging behaviour through the school, some tricky staff members and poor results. I went in to this school with my 'saviour mode' at the forefront of my thinking. However, it became impossible as the leadership from above was not strong enough. We would make decisions together, but if somebody argued about it, the decision would be changed without any further consultation. However, this said, this head held her head high throughout, showed me how to have dignity and was superb at dealing with tricky parents.

Head Teacher 4: This head was just a 'super head' to me. I took the decision to move onto another deputy headship for my own well-being as my previous school had knocked my confidence to a very low ebb. However, this head saw my potential and encouraged me to be the best I could be. I was highly involved in all decision making, had prominent roles throughout the school and was able to have a significant impact upon the school. Trust was a big part of what he would do; he would trust you to lead, trust you to teach, trust your decisions. He also had a wonderful human touch, and knew when to have quiet chats with staff. We would have regular catch ups, have out of school meetings, would have dinner together before governors meetings and have genuinely become good friends.

These experiences moulded me into the head I wanted to be and helped shape my vision for education. I firmly believe that all children deserve the best education that we can provide, but they need to be stimulated and excited by what they do. I will never be a head that puts too much emphasis on data - it is only part of the tale. I said in my interview, that I do not care about the Ofsted "Outstanding" grading (which was part of the interview pack!) - I want to be outstanding at what we do. I firmly believe to get the best out of the children, you need to get the best out of your most valuable resource - the people that work with them. For me, there are 5 key points to being a compassionate leader:

1.Trust. Trust your team. They are highly professional people and treat them like so; a little trust goes a long way. Remove high stakes data driven accountability. Remove high pressure lesson observation. Remove micro-managed consistency (e.g. displays!)

2. Be people focused. Remember that your staff are human and have lives outside of school. Give time for people to attend important family events. If people go over and above, recognise it. If performance in dropping, ask why, don't jump on them. Have chats with people, get to know them as individuals and be open to discussion.

3. Be authentic. Admit mistakes if you make them. Be open with your decision making. Allow people to see your flaws - if a decision is hard, let them know; if you are struggling with something, ask for help. Model what you want to see.

4. Have fun. Enjoy doing what you do. Enjoy the children and the buzz of learning. Enjoy your staff. Get out on school trips. Still teach. Do an after school club. Play at break times (who doesn't like scoring a worldy against the Year 6 boys?). Enjoy your family.

5. Be compassionate to yourself. You cannot be a compassionate leader if you cannot look after yourself. Model what you want to see. Put work life balance high on your own agenda. Put your family as your number one priority. Do not work yourself to the bone. Have hobbies. Try not to beat yourself up if mistakes are made.

I am still working on number 5!

Being compassionate can sometimes come across as weak, and it is something I often have internal dialogues with myself about and sometimes question whether I need to be tougher or more dictatorial. Being a people pleaser, having difficult conversations is very difficult for me - I cannot separate the head teacher and person - and I often have to plan for a while before these meetings and have, at times, put them off entirely because of anxiety. This is something I know I need to improve and it is coming but does need more work. I also worry that people may take advantage of my kind and compassionate nature, and do the usual thing of giving an inch, they take a mile. However, this has rarely happened and I think it is something I worry about personally rather than something that is happening.

Another thing I have noticed is that change can sometimes take a little bit of time when leading compassionately. One teacher has moved a long way with their practice, and this has come through prompting, guiding, suggesting and coaching. This could potentially have happened sooner with a more direct and dictatorial approach, but at what cost to personal relationships and morale? It is a hard question to answer, as I have seen teachers improve this way and accept that their practice needed to change, but I have to be authentic to who I am. One concern I had with my approach was how other teachers saw my handling of situations and whether they thought somebody was getting an easier ride than them and not putting as much into the job as they do. It has been mentioned, but I think people saw my methods and it has not become an issue.

I hope you have enjoyed my first blog and please leave comments below or contact me on Twitter if you would like to ask me anything.