School leadership is not easy, but in my opinion it is still the best job in the world. The good days outweigh the bad ones. Don't get me wrong, there are days when you could just throw it all in and walk away. I know of many a good head that has done exactly that and the figures released today that show a quarter of all primary heads leave within 5 years.
I have so far made it to six, so I have gone past this statistic. There have been times I have almost left. I have written my letter of resignation three times. The first time, I went to a PTA meeting with the aim of discussing school plans for the next year and how they could support the school. It ended up being a personal attack on me, criticising every decision I have ever made and one parent even making the claim that I "preferred the girls in the school" and that "they had a member of staff keeping an eye on me". That was one of the most awful moments of my career, completely without justification and I had to have the support of my family to not just walk away.
After unpicking this situation, even though it was a personal attack, it was actually the only way these parents felt they could take their frustrations out. They were used to my predecessor just doing what they say, not really pushing the school forward and generally just coasting. I came in and laid down a marker that we would make decisions based on what is in the best interests of the school and the children as the trained professionals. Of course we would listen to parents' concerns, but ultimately they need to trust us to do what we do. We are highly trained, know educational research and have the whole picture.
The second time I almost left was after an unsavoury incident with a member of staff, where accusations were made of me being unprofessional. This culminated in this member of staff stalking me on Twitter, on Facebook and keeping a daily diary about me. Everything written could have been misconstrued when taken out of context, but it was clear that this member of staff was trying to manufacture a case against me for some unknown reason and I still do not know why they wanted to ruin my career and break me. This resulted in complaints to governors, the LA, the LADO, and Ofsted. In each of these times, the claims were found to be malicious in intent. Again, that drained me so much and made me lose the love of the job for a long time. I was scarred and I still am to be honest.
The third time I had my resignation written was when I had a parent come in with a list of complaints from the parents. They actually went around the other parents and asked them for anything they were not happy with about me. These included:
- He crossed his arms when he spoke to me which is aggressive body language
- He didn't denounce homosexuality when I asked his views
- He has pushed a healthy living agenda
- He is ego-centric and makes everything about him
This was personal, for no reason but to be vindictive! Again, this took a while to get over as personal attacks make you feel rubbish!
However, whenever I feel like this I have been lucky to have a supportive wife who helps me pull myself together and a chair of governors who gets it as an ex-deputy head and she listens and helps me work through it. She also doesn't stand for any crap and calls a spade a spade which really helps when the going gets tough.
One thing that helps me is to try and focus on the positives, of which there are many. For me, I need to walk around the school to feel proud of what I have managed to do with the school. It was a school that at best was coasting, at worst was slipping back. I have managed to reinvigorate it and motivated the staff to bring the school forward such a long way. I know how lucky I am to have a team of teachers and (mostly) support staff who trust me and back me. This makes it easier to make changes as they know that decisions made are always made with the best interest of the school and the children. They are now even more accepting of my more "out-there" and "blue sky thinking" ideas that I may come up with.
Another positive is actually the vast majority of feedback we receive from parents. Most parents are very happy and complimentary of what we do. At times of "darkness" when that one parent raises their "concerns" again, it is important to put it into perspective. Have those positive messages near to hand. Hold a positive phone call with a parent. Look through your latest parent questionnaire. This will remind you that the vast majority of people are happy.
Most importantly, I go and speak to children. Seeing happy children, making great progress and enjoying a wide curriculum is what makes us buzz. Those conversations are so important. They keep you grounded. You see the impact you are having. You get to know the most important people in the building. You get positive feedback. You laugh. They tell you rubbish jokes. They are the why we do it. If you are getting bogged down - get out at break time, go on a school trip, join in a lesson (just for the fun of it, not for accountability purposes) or run a club. This keeps you sane - honestly!
I am quite lucky in the fact that I am a very principled person. I know exactly what I believe is important for the children, the staff and the school. It may not be right, but they are my beliefs. These can be distilled into these five simple statements:
I don't care about Ofsted. Simple as that. I have removed that pressure from myself and my team. If we do what is right for the children, Ofsted takes care of itself. Of course I will be prepared for it and will be able to tell the story of my school and will support my team to do the same for their subjects, but we never do anything because "Ofsted want to see it", and I do mean never.
Data is important but it is not king. Data does not dominate what we do. It informs conversations about children and how we can best support them. Data is not a stick to beat your staff with. It is not the sole barometer of the success of the school. Know your context, know your stories. Again, do what is right for the children and the data will take care of itself.
Provide opportunities for children. Make sure your curriculum is rich. Make sure it provides children with opportunities they wouldn't normally experiences. Make sure the children access great books. Make sure children can problem solve and can link their knowledge. Make sure all children are included. Never exclude children based on preconceived ideas. Give all children the chance to shine.
Trust your team. I trust my team to do the right thing and they do not let me down. I am not dictatorial. I do not force them to teach in a certain way. I do not observe them to an inch of their lives. I do not use data as a stick. We have professional conversations. We have difficult conversations if needed, but I still trust them to do the best for the children.
Get involved with the children. Be a visible head. Teach. Go on trips. Get out at play time. Skip with the children. Play football with the children. Make silly jokes. Show you care for them. Invest in them. Be firm when you need to. Praise and reward regularly. Find out about them and ask them questions. Be humble and admit mistakes. Do this, and in my experience the behaviour of the children improves.
As I said at the start, this works for me - it will not be the same for everybody. I have been on the edge of leaving but the great bits of the job outweigh the crap. Focus on what makes you happy. Keep your why in the forefront of your mind and most importantly remember what is important (and that really is not Ofsted!).